The term 'fangirl' is used quite often in this world. Whether its refering to the fanbase of musicians, comic books, movies, YouTubers or something entirely different, I think it cheapens a lot of things. By definition a fangirl is, "A female who has overstepped the line between healthy fandom and indecent obsession." Assumably the term fanboy, means the exact same thing, only with male instead of female. The definition alone though does not sound good.
Now, its fine if you wish to call yourself a fangirl/boy of someone, or something. It doesn't have to bother you or cheapen anything. You know how much you love that thing, and what it means to you. A word might not make a difference to you in the slightest. For myself though, its almost an insult. Let me explain, I realize that sounds a bit strange to say.
Music journalists, such as myself, start doing what they do simply because they are a fan of music. Obviously, there's going to be some artists they favor, and even adore. A lot of the time, someone can't express a great love for any 'fandom' as the internet calls it, without getting called a fangirl. And when I hear someone call me nothing more than a fangirl, I feel that takes away from what I do. It goes from a passion for something, to nothing more than a silly obsession. Not saying obsessions are silly, in fact, they're quite fun to have. Its just....I am trying to build a reputation, in a world where I'm already not taken seriously by many. I try to be 'professional' even though I actually have no idea what it means to be professional. I just write about what I love -which is music.
When I think of a fangirl, I picture someone who's crying and screaming just at the sight of the celebrity they love. That's fine, and they have reasons to be crying and screaming. There's nothing wrong with being a fangirl, just...that's not me. Only celebrities I have ever cried and screamed over are the Jonas Brotehrs. I was younger though, and I admit, if Nick Jonas got in the same room with me, I cannot guarentee the fifteen year old JB fanatic would not come out of me. I'd try to contain it though because I want to be remembered, not as another crying, screaming fan, but as me.
Not to mention, I am quite strange I think, when it comes to band members or other celebrities. I don't put them up on pedistals. I see them for what they are -human beings. I'd say 'normal people', but nobody is normal, so that doesn't work in the slightest. I can even be a huge fan of someone, and even be super excited to be meeting them, but the second they walk up, something comes over me. The nerves and excitment just go away the moment they are within earshot of me, and its just like walking up to any random person in Walmart. I hope that feeling isn't just something I experience.
I don't know....I just don't like being called a fangirl, because as cocky and pretentious as this is going to sound, I'd like to think I'm more than that. Yes, I let down my professional walls and talk about band members as if they're my friends, and practically drool over pictures and fanfictions now and again. Its an escape! Music is an escape and there's a time and place to be a fan, and to be professional. Regardless of if I get paid for this, this is my work. A lot of people don't realize that. They see what I do as a hobby, as something I just do for fun, but its so much more to me. Its my life.
Perfect example of why I really don't see myself as a 'fangirl', and how it apparently is not obvious. As many people who follow my work know, I am a very big fan of All Time Low. I saw them for the first time in 2012, and a friend of mine came with me for this show. He hardly had a clue who ATL was, but I needed help getting to the show, so he helped out. At the show, we met Jack Barakat, and my friend apparently was expecting me to freak out over him. Jack walked up, he talked with another friend of mine (who has met him many times before), about various things, including an interview with me. I probably looked like I was being shy, because I wasn't saying a word, but I actually was just trying to be poliet. Those two knew each other, Jack didn't know me. When he was asked about my interview, he looked almost pained because he had to say no. I said it was fine, and actually ended up shooing him away not long after that because he admitted he was late for his meet and greet, after agreeing to take a picture with me really fast. He hesitated to say yes to the picture, and I saw that, so I asked if he was late for something. (This was partly because I had seen their tour manager running around, clearly stressed out and had told us he was trying to get the meet and greet situated.) I admit, I did wait an hour after the show to get that picture, and do also have almost all of All Time Low's signatures on a copy of Don't Panic. I am a fan, I freely admit that.
But what amuses me , is just a few weeks ago, the same friend of mine used the word "fangirl" and I said, "I don't fangirl." He responded with, "Bullshit! All Time Low." I feel like I might have been slightly insulted and taken aback by him saying that, so I probably a bit defensively responded with, "No. You were there when I met Jack." (Just throwing this out there, I am only talking about meeting Jack Barakat because I only half met Rian and Zack and have yet to actually meet Alex still.) His answer surprised me, because I thought he knew that show was my first All Time Low show, and that moment when Jack walked up was the first time I had even seen him in person. He responded with, "What about the FIRST time you met him?" He didn't know how to respond at all when I said, "That was the first time!" He hasn't said I was a fangirl of anything ever since.
I don't know. What are your thoughts on the matter? Do you mind being called a fangirl/boy of things? Do you think it cheapens things, or is it just a word? Clearly, I don't think its just a word, and kind of went on a rant about it all.
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