So, its most definitely just boredom setting in, but I was doing some thinking. If you're on the Facebook page a lot, you know a few of my favorite songs are, because there are a few songs I share often. However, I started thinking about it, and I've always had quite the extensive list of songs I feel particularly attached to, most of various reasons. I started thinking about it, and I'm not even sure what all would be on that list now.
This is definitely something I've done at some point over the years, and honestly, its fun for me to look back on. I looked through some of the old posts from the early days (2011-2013) and didn't see anything, but then I remembered I used to keep a short list of songs I was loving in the about me page. That's changed many times over the years, and I just realized its currently hidden from the public. I should probably finish that and make that public again, huh? I looked it over and it needs some serious editing and a make over, so stay tuned for that since I'm now aware of it.
Anyway, so here's a list of songs I feel are my favorites for now, just because why not? Please feel free to send me a list of your favorite songs as well! I have no reason for this, I just got kind of bored and started thinking about my favorite songs. There's only two I actually ever name, but there's absolutely a whole long list of songs I prefer. And the list changes, so it'll be fun to look back at sometime in the future.
Also, quick note. Aside from the first two songs, this isn't really in any order, it was just as I thought of them. I only named ten because surprisingly, when I really stopped to think about it, while there's tons of songs I find myself turning on often, there's not that many I feel particularly attached to for one reason or another.
1. Scars -Papa Roach
2. Bow Down -I Prevail
3. Weightless- All TIme Low
4. Unity -Shinedown
5. I Hate Everything About You- Three Days Grace
6. Famous Last Words -My Chemical Romance
7. Hold On -Jonas Brothers
8. Face Everything And Rise -Papa Roach
9. Hurricane -I Prevail
10. All I Want -A Day To Remember
Also just felt like adding, currently I would say my favorite bands are I Prevail, All Time Low, A Day To Remember, Shinedown, and Papa Roach. Probably in that order, actually.
I'm still questioning this list, like if there's more songs, or what order I would actually put them in if I was to stop and think about it. Now there's definitely other songs by all these bands that I love, and if anyone wants me to, I can make lists of all my favorites from all my favorite bands. I might do that anyway, just because why not?
Meanwhile, let me know your favorite songs and bands. I'm actually really enjoying the semi aimless writing about music again. It really is taking me back to the early days of Immortal Music, back when I was mostly doing this just for fun and the love of music. Let me know your favorites and I will talk to you guys soon.
Do you ever get a song stuck in your head that just won't leave? We all get songs stuck in our heads, but typically, I think they get stuck, you listen to it once or twice, get busy with other things and then forget about it. I assume other people do this too, but I tend to get something stuck in my head every single day. In fact, I often wake up with something stuck in my head, but it usually dissipates within a couple hours of waking up. But sometimes, I'll listen to a song, get it stuck in my head, and then it embeds itself in my head and refuses to leave.
Like I can just be sitting there, minding my own business, doing something completely unrelated to the song or even music in general, and then all the sudden, I will just have part of a song screaming at me. Sometimes literally, I might add. So I'll go and listen to it, trying to get it out. That doesn't work. Then repeat this cycle for MONTHS. I can guarantee you this has happened my whole life, so therefor, there's definitely more songs than what I can name that have done this to me. But, there's 3 in particular that I can think of, that have lasted a very long time. And by very long time, I mean more than a couple days.
The three songs are, "Don't Threaten Me With A Good Time" by Panic! At The Disco, "Bow Down" by I Prevail, and the most recent one, "Sleeping In"by All Time Low. Weird mix, I know. Now "Bow Down" is the longest running one, as that song came out just over a year ago now and I'm pretty sure its popped into my head at least once every single day since then. That only got worse after I saw I Prevail live in August 2019, but I think everyone on the Facebook page knows that by now. More than one person has grown to realize that's pretty much my favorite song just because of how often I've shared it.
"Don't Threaten Me With A Good Time", was a random one. I had heard it a time or two, and had the whole Death of A Bachelor album on my iPod. And I was actually in line to meet Shane Dawson at a Books A Million, when a friend asked if I had that song, because it was stuck in his head. I said yeah, and gave him an earbud. We listened to it, maybe two times? It wasn't excessive, and then for some reason it was severely stuck in my head. When I mentioned this on the Facebook page, I said it was only about four months it was stuck in my head, but that's absolutely false. I started thinking about it after I said it, and I am positive it was still stuck in my head near the end of that year.
Still no idea why, either. Because as much as I like the song, its not meaningful, and its just random really. Have you seen that music video? If you haven't, highly recommend you do. It tells quite the story, you will be hooked on it just for the weirdness alone.
"Bow Down", was a rather different. At first, I just found it catchy, plus I was so excited to have new music from I Prevail. But then it grew to feel very personal for me. So now its a mix of both, and yes it definitely is one of my favorite songs. Fun fact, I would say that and "Scars" by Papa Roach are my favorite songs. If you want to hear more thoughts on that, click here. I wrote a whole thing about songs that had impacted me over the last decade and talked about that a bit.
Now as for "Sleeping In".....man, I don't even know what's up with that. Because frankly, out of all the songs All Time Low released prior to the release of their new album, Wake Up Sunshine, I initially said this was my least favorite. Just because its light hearted and fun, there's no meaning to it. But that being said, what I didn't talk about at all in my interview was this is one of the only songs on the album that has that truly classic All Time Low sound. This one felt like it easily could have been released right along Nothing Personal or Dirty Work, but its brand new.
I think its because its just catchy fun that it keeps getting stuck in my head. All I know is the song has only been out for one month, and its been stuck in my head for three weeks. Which is how long I've been in quarantine, I might add. I still love the song, but the fact that I just have the first half or so of the chorus just playing on repeat in my head is getting old. Like imagine, you're almost asleep in bed, all nice and comfy with the fan on, and then all the sudden you hear Alex Gaskgarth screaming, "IF I SAID I WANTED YOUR BODY, WOULD YOU HOLD IT AGAINST ME? SEVEN IN THE MORNING, WANNA LISTEN TO BRITTNEY", in your head. Like I get it, go listen to Britney Spears and lay in bed, I'm trying to sleep! I say that with a laugh, by the way. I'm not even actually annoyed with this, just am questioning why its so deeply in my mind for absolutely no reason.
I listened to it three times while writing this by the way, and its still stuck. We'll see if I still like the song by the time this quarantine crap is over, because if it stays at this rate, I'm going to over play it. That's not something I even experience often, but I could see it happening. Also side note, the singles for Wake Up Sunshine really brought my love of All Time Low back to the surface. I didn't like their last album, Last Young Renegade very much, so while I still enjoyed everything but that, and still listened once in a while, I didn't find myself loving them nearly to the extent I used to. Ever since, "Some Kind Of Disaster" came out, that love has come back. Not sure if that's a good thing or not, but I'm not complaining.
Also, I know this was totally pointless and random, but I felt like writing, so I went with it. Its a way to interact, stave off my own boredom, and pass the time. So, with that being said, expect more random, thought dumps out of me because I very well might do it. And while we're at it, please feel free to tell me any songs that are stuck in your head right now. You can do so in the comments here or over on the Facebook page on the link to this post, or in a private message. I'm always here to talk if anyone wants to.
I'll probably be back shortly, as I have a couple more ideas of random posts I wish to make, and still plan on doing a ton of reviews.
I saw a post a little while ago on Facebook, that apparently came from Instagram, that just inspired me. This post was originally from Lzzy Hale of Halestorm, though I saw it through an internet friend. She took the time to list fifteen songs that have shaped her into who she is today, and when I saw this, I instantly started questioning that for myself. There's so many songs that have helped get me through a lot of tough times in my life, and there's a few bands that I hold dear to my heart for similar reasons. But to name the individual songs? I have no idea.
But in light of this whole world wide quarantine, I'm finding myself hiding in my music again. I gotta tell you, the other night I spent a solid two hours or so going down a rabbit hole of related videos and discovered several bands I had never heard of. It really brought me back to my early days of loving music, and made me feel better than I have in a few days.
I don't know about you, but this whole thing is really stressing me out. The extrovert in me really isn't handling the indefinite 'social distancing' very well. Anyway, with all that in mind, having such a post crop up this morning felt almost prophetic. Okay, maybe that's a little dramatic, but I still think its fun, and this gives me something fun to do for a little while. I encourage you guys to do the same -please let me know what songs have impacted you in some way shape or form. Let's get this conversation going! It sounds like fun for all, and we all could discover some new music along the way.
All the songs I'm choosing to list really are in no order, and some are ones I consider to be my favorite songs. Some once were, but are not now. If you've been around for a while, chances are you won't be surprised by a couple of the songs on my list. I'll just go ahead and start with the two I consider to be my favorite songs. Well, two of my favorite songs. We'll be here for a while if I tried to list all my favorite songs....which I might do in a separate post just to pass some time.
The first songs I want to list are "Scars" by Papa Roach and "Bow Down" by I Prevail. I've talked about both of these songs before, and if you're on the Facebook page, you know I am extremely attached to "Bow Down." I'd go so far as to say that is my favorite song right now. I'm not going to explain that again, if you want to hear more about how those two go together for me personally, click here. I wrote a whole reflection on songs that impacted the entire last decade and I did talk about the coloration between both songs.
I actually had a hard time listing fifteen songs, if I'm honest. I listen to a ton of different bands and artists, and know for a fact that I've gone through several phases with my music. My favorite bands change every so often, and when I was younger, that was almost monthly. So there's absolutely songs that impacted me for a short period of time, hundreds probably. But the list of songs that have impacted me long term is much slimmer. When I decided to actually make my list, I came up with seven with no hesitation. All but one would not surprise anyone, I'm certain of that. The one that would surprise most people, actually in a roundabout way lead to all the others. Ironically, that's the Jonas Brother's cover of "Year 3000", which came out in 2006.
Anyone who actually knows me in person, knows I was a hardcore JB fangirl back in the day. I sometimes hate to admit it, but you know what? Its just the truth, and at least I outgrew the obsessing somewhat. Or at least evolved it somewhat. The reason though I included this song in particular though is because it was the first song I had ever heard from them. I absolutely hated it when I first heard it, but then my best friend played the music video on repeat for about an hour while we made cookies. It got stuck in my head, and I got completely hooked on them. This lasted for several years, and while I do not love their new stuff, they still hold a very special place in my heart.
In a way though, I really thank them for quite a bit. For starters, had my best friend Sara and I not been so obsessed with them, I solidly don't think we would have stayed a close as we did after she moved out of state. So there's that, but then to add to it, I actually think they're what lead me into journalism, in a sense. That wasn't the main thing, but because I was so interested in them, I spent so much time researching them as people and the lore behind their music. I even made a website back in the day, full of what I now know isn't all truthful information. Didn't know that at the time, but you learn as times go on.
But because of all that, I was already in the habit of learning about the people behind the music when I started getting into rock and metal. It was habit for many years to research and learn about the bands as I was listening to them. Even if it was only just the names of the members, I still made it a point to look into what I was listening to. I've only somewhat recently gotten out of that habit, actually. So honestly, I really do think I can thank the Jonas Brothers for leading me into where I ended up.
Which also does bring me to "Waking The Demon" by Bullet For My Valentine, as well as something by Three Days Grace. For this, I'm going to say "Break", but I definitely was already listening to them when that one came out. And surely something impacted me prior to that, but I honestly can't remember which one or if it was prior or if it was several years later.
Three Days Grace and Bullet For My Valentine are original bands for me. They're what I consider to be the first rock/ metal bands I liked, and I turned to both for comfort for quite some time. "Waking The Demon" though was 100% the first BFMV song I had ever heard, and I wanna say it was the first with any screaming in it that I liked. That's a bit of an irrelevant fact though, I suppose.
If I'm honest, I couldn't think of fifteen songs that really had a massive impact. I can think of hundreds of songs I've been attached to at some point, but not ones that really impacted me on a personal, long term level. I don't think I need to find a deep meaning for every single song, so I'll just list what I can and I hope you guys enjoy the list. And what I did explain. This actually took me a couple days to put together, just because I kept losing the motivation. This whole social distancing thing really isn't doing wonders for my mental health, but I promise I'm trying. So if you see me posting more on the Facebook page, or possibly here just for fun, that's because I am trying to be productive. I'm trying to distract myself. Which is why I encourage anyone who reads this to reach out. We can talk about anything, music related or not. Feel free to message the page. I'm here for you guys.
Thanks for joining me! Now here is the list of only nine songs. Its not the fifteen I mentioned prior, but hey, its still something. Stay tuned because I do have some light hearted ideas for other posts, and frankly, I gotta do something to keep myself occupied so I might as well put the ideas to good use. I'll talk to ya'll real soon, and once again please let me know some songs that have impacted you in one way or another. You don't have to make a whole list or anything, but I would love to hear from you.
Too long? Didn't read? Just skimmed the whole post to get to the point? Here's the list: (These are in no real order)
Scars -Papa Roach
Bow Down- I Prevail
Year 3000 -Jonas Brothers
Waking The Demon -Bullet For My Valentine
Break -Three Days Grace
Save Me -Shinedown
Stay Awake -All Time Low
Legacy -Memphis May Fire
I Won't Break -Escape The Fate
So All Time Low has been being lowkey cryptic for a week or so now, and obviously we all knew they were doing something. I'm trying to figure out why this year so far is definitely the year for bands thinking they're being sneaky by building up tension with vague posts. We all know what you're doing, you're all either going on tour or releasing something.
In this case, All Time Low released a brand new song, "Some Kind Of Disaster" and while it probably was not necessary for me to write about it with my thoughts or anything like that, I just felt like it. If you haven't heard it yet, please do so here. As I am about to talk about the song and spoil the video.
If you've been around for a while, you know I've always liked All Time Low, but you also might be aware that I am not the biggest fan of their last album, Last Young Renegade. I didn't hate it by any means, but I definitely didn't feel a connection to it either.
That being said though, I did love their revamped version of Nothing Personal, and find myself actually turning on some of the songs on that more than the originals now. So, I'm curious to see how I feel about this. Especially since they lead into it by saying they've done a lot of soul searching and healing. Says to me there was a lot going on on their semi short hiatus, and I'm just hopeful that they're all in a better head space.
The video starts with a note, "In an empty room, I let myself begin again." And we find Alex looking for a room that appears to be an AA meeting.
I think I really like this style....and this meeting actually seems to be for those facing their hard truths, not an AA meeting. One line hit hard, "You gotta hurt sometimes to heal. You gotta get back up alone and deal."
He also speaks of being the ghost of his mistakes, as well as taking blame for having someone fall in love with him. The wording makes me assume its something unrequited, meaning someone other than his wife. That's just a guess, unless they're having issues nobody's aware of. Hopefully that is not the case.
This whole song seems to hit extremely hard, and I would say is one of their deepest songs from their entire discography. Which says a lot, considering they've been a band for seventeen years, and their first album came out fifteen years ago. Let that sink for a second....that's a weird thought. Especially since I am pretty sure I discovered them even about thirteen years ago when I think of that. Times fly, jeez. Sorry, I actually had that realization while typing. Moving on.
I'm really curious to see what the next new album offers for us. If its all similar to that, I'm pretty sure I am going to love it. Please share your thoughts with me! Are you excited for the inevitable new album? And let me know what you think of the song.
How is it already 2020? Its already a week into the new year, is it too late to post a reflection of the last decade? I don't know, I don't care. I started this in 2019 for that's worth, I just solidly procrastinated and am going to continue anyway. I was a little bit nervous to share this, because its not just about the music. Its about life, and its all real. A good handful of people spoke up on the Facebook page and said yes they would like to hear about life and the music that's impacted me, so here I am. I hope you guys enjoy, and please feel free to share some of the stuff that's impacted you over the last ten years. Or even just year, if you would like. Without further a due, here goes nothing.
Time really flies. I swear it was just 2012, what happened? My mom always said time starts flying as you get older, and as a kid I solidly did not believe her. Thought she was just being dramatic or something. It always drug by when I was little, and I couldn't wait to grow up and be an adult. What the hell did I sign up for? Excuse me, this is not what was advertised at all, and I would like a refund. Thank you.
I'm joking, I swear. Except for the time flying thing, that was dead serious. So much has happened in the last decade, and I have to say this one helped define who I am. This was the first decade of my adult life, seeing as I turned eighteen in 2011. Hell, it was probably 2008 or so when I started really getting into rock and metal, which obviously makes a massive difference. I'm sure I don't even have to explain that one, given where you're reading this.
A friend of mine, whom I actually met through music, and then ended up bonding over music journalism with inspired this post. Her name is Hali Neal, and she made an article for her music journalism platform, When Music Speaks, reminiscing on her favorite albums of the decade. She sent me a draft of it to look over, so I read a slightly different version than what you will see when you go to her site. Which you should totally do, by clicking here.
I asked her if I was allowed to steal her idea, and she said I was, so here we are! I wanted to take the time to reflect, and talk about some of my favorite albums from the past ten years as well. Because honestly, I could instantly think of a couple I wanted to include, and for very personal reasons. Now some of this, I was a little bit uneasy to share publicly, out of fears of being judged but you know what? I think I want to go into 2020 with less fear, and everyone has something in their life that they've been troubled by, so fuck it. Get comfortable, this is going to be a long, reflective road.
First though, we have to rewind to just before the decade started. Back to 2009, when I was sixteen, and just truly beginning to shift into loving rock music. I had been looking into some of it for a while, but only a year or two I would say. At the time, I solidly remember my favorite bands were the Jonas Brothers, All Time Low, Three Days Grace, and Bullet For My Valentine, and I started going to a church youth group, not for religious reasons at all, but just to make friends.
Sure enough, I did make friends, some of which I am still friends with to this day. Actually met a couple of my best friends there. One actually introduced me to the other, and they both helped fill the mold I had already opened. They both highly encouraged the music, and included me with their other interests, such as some movies and YouTube, which made all the difference. It was actually one of them introducing me to Bryan Stars Interviews that lead me to wanting to do journalism properly in the first place. I actually was already low key dabbling with it at the time, but it was very subtly and I hadn't fully put two and two together at that point.
It mostly started in 2010 when I started the Facebook page that is now for Immortal Music. Originally, it was its own stand alone place for me to share my love of music with complete strangers called Music= Life. I actually started it at a time in my life when I felt very alone, and I guess I just needed the outlet, but it obviously turned into a lot more. At the time, I don't even think I really bothered to try to define myself. Looking back it it, I wasn't that different than I am now, except I think I was more of a doormat and was just trying to make something of myself. At that point in my life, I wanted to be a graphic and web designer, and my only real identifiers were a Disney loving, Jonas Brothers obsessed girl. I really don't think there was much else to me, looking back at it.
It was actually this time in my life that brings me to the first album I want to talk about, which was Life Starts Now by Three Days Grace. This was the first TDG to come out after I was a fan of them. I had known about them for most of their career, but didn't really get into them until sometime between when One-X came out and this one. At the time this album came out, I was feeling completely hurt by people. I was homeschooled and at that particular time, felt like a complete outcast from my entire group. This album was pretty much brand new at the time, and at some point I realized if you rearranged the track listing, it pretty much walked you through the process of putting people behind you. Or maybe that was just me being emo as shit, I don't really know.
Either way, that album is still one of my go to albums when I'm feeling moody, or need to calm down. old Three Days Grace will forever hold a special place in my heart. My favorite songs on the album are, "Life Starts Now", "Break" and "Someone Who Cares."
Fast forward a couple years, and honestly life was pretty good. I started properly doing journalism in 2011, and I would say 2012 was the biggest year for me, journalism wise. Ironically, when I think of this time, there actually wasn't a stand out album immediately. I think I was listening to so much good music that it took a moment to really pin point any albums. I have more memories from events and concerts than I do specific albums.
I knew I wanted to give an honorable mention somewhere to Shinedown, and honestly I was a bit torn on what album to give a mention to. I love pretty much all of their work, and they've had three wonderful albums this decade. The first of the decade was Amaryllis, which came out in 2012, and does house one of my favorite songs from them. That one is "Unity" and if you haven't heard it, you absolutely should. It embodies the feeling you get during a concert, where you just feel whole and everything's okay.
Shinedown has done so much for me this decade, and I wish I could have known when I discovered them just how special they would be to me. I'm jumping around a bit with my timelines here, but it all goes together, so whatever, it still works. I hold them very close to my heart for many reasons, but primarily because if it weren't for them, I solidly believe Immortal Music would not have gotten as far as it has. In 2014, their guitarist Zach Myers did an incredible acoustic show with his best friend Justin Moore. They had absolutely no set list, no time limit, just played whatever they wanted. It was just two friends sharing the love of music, and it was seriously one of the best things I've ever seen. That night, I also interviewed Zach and Justin, and Zach told me he didn't particularly like doing interviews but said yes because he liked how I asked. I also realized the next morning, that was sheer luck. I thought I had emailed his manager, but had never heard back. I asked him in person and he said he thought there was something he forgot to answer to, so go ahead. Yeahhhh I never sent the email. In fact, its still in my drafts to this day, despite being almost six years ago. I never plan on deleting it either, just because I find it slightly hilarious.
But then on top of that wonderful experience, the next day I posted a recap of the entire night, and Shinedown actually shared it. That caused me to get about triple the daily views for a few days, and it stayed around until I stopped posting as frequently. If I ever get a chance to personally thank them, I will. They have no idea how much they've helped me, and I know usually its lyrically. They have so many fantastic songs, and they are one I turn to when I need a distraction or comfort, but that's the biggest thing they've done for me. Also, random fun fact. In the commentary video for "Asking For It", I'm positive Zach is talking about me, because he mentioned I question I asked that was uncommon. Nobody can convince me otherwise.
Back tracking again, just to 2013 really quick. That was a rather hard year, and I admit, I was nearly completely inactive on the website that year. That year we lost my dog, my childhood home and my great grandma. I don't remember actively turning to much that year, but I do remember listening to Sempiternal from Bring Me The Horizon a good handful, as well as Ungrateful by Escape The Fate.
Sempiternal was one I was a little late to, it had been out five or six months before I gave it a shot. The reason being, I didn't like BMTH before that album. Lyrically I liked them, but sound wise, I couldn't stand it. So when I heard some of the hype with Sempiternal and how different it was from anything they had ever done, due to Oli's vocal injuries and rehabilitation from his addiction, I got curious.
And oh my god, did that end up getting put on repeat for months. Same thing happened when That's The Spirit came out, three years later. We'll get to that in a bit though. My favorite albums from Sempiternal are, "Go To Hell For Heaven's Sake", "Antivist", and "Can You Feel My Heart?"
As for Ungrateful, I just listen to all of ETF's stuff. They've been toward the top of my radar since right around the time Ronnie Radke went to jail and Craig Mabbitt joined. So whenever they have a new album, I tend to listen to it right away. That album is arguably one of their best, and I find myself turning on a lot of the songs often. My absolute favorites are "You're Insane" and "Ungrateful" though. I also had a phase for a while where "Live Fast and Die Beautiful" was my favorite, and while I still like it, I have absolutely no idea why it was my favorite at one point in time. Really can't explain that one to anyone, I just really liked it.
Skipping ahead once again to 2016, which if I'm honest, was probably the hardest year of my life. This is also the year I've been slightly afraid to talk about, just due to some sensitive things that happened that year. But they deeply effected me, and are things I think of basically daily, and some music really did help me get through it all.
In the summer of 2016, I broke up with my boyfriend of a year, as well as did my last interview. All in the same day, I might add. That was with Lacey Strum, formerly of Flyleaf, and if I'm honest, events that happened not long after that, kind of overshadowed it. The only thing I remember really from that interview is getting on the bus, her standing up to introduce herself to me, and then me realizing she was shorter than me. Well, and her offering me pickles out of the jar she was eating, to which I said yes because I too love pickles.
About a month and a half, two months later, I got into a relationship with someone I now see saw an opportunity and took advantage of my vulnerable situation. I didn't see it at the time, but hindsight is 20/20. Fitting considering the new year, isn't it? I actually smirked at that as I wrote it, but this is where things get serious, so moving on.
Not too long after that, I got pregnant.
It completely blind-sighted me, mostly because I always thought if that was to happen, I would be happy about it. Scared sure, but I've always loved babies and little kids, I've always said I wanted my own. But something didn't feel right, some gut feeling was practically screaming that this was wrong. I tried to get excited, even bought some baby stuff in hopes that maybe bringing it more to reality would make me more excited. But it didn't. I still tried to tell myself it was fine, it was just new and scary, and I would end up loving them. The father was extremely excited, as he thought he couldn't have kids at all, so he tried to keep my excitement up some.
Then one evening, we went to a restaurant, and I got a call from my best friend who lives out of state. By some force of nature, she had also found out she was pregnant, not long after me. She was surprisingly rather excited about the idea, and we both joked that we clearly couldn't do anything on our own. But this call wasn't a good one. She stepped away from celebrating her marriage, and asked if I could talk to her for a second. She sounded really upset, and of course I said yes. And I will never forget what she said. "We're pretty sure I'm having a miscarriage." I instantly started crying, I felt horrible because deep down I knew how I felt, and she had been so happy to be in the same situation.
We didn't talk for long, but as soon as I hung up, my boyfriend asked what was wrong. It was then I finally admitted to myself and to him how I really felt. The words that slipped out of my mouth were, "Why is it her and not me?"
That started a lot of things. We left the restaurant, and he solidly tried to tell me he would just keep the baby and I wouldn't have to be involved at all. I couldn't do it, I didn't want some child being out in the world knowing their mother didn't want them. There's too many kids in this world already that have to deal with that, and I didn't want that. You guys see where this is going, don't you?
I had horrible cramps every single day, and I still solidly think I more than likely would have miscarried anyway, just due to the pains I was having. On November 17, 2016, I had an abortion, and I don't regret it one bit, but I do think about it every single day. He didn't come with, and at the time, that really hurt, but looking back at it, I don't blame him for not wanting to be there. He was just as hurt as I was, just in different ways, and I have no doubt he thinks about it most days too.
I was the only woman there that didn't have their significant other there supporting them, instead I had my mom, and the Planned Parenthood staff was incredible. They all were so sweet, open and comforting, and there was one lady in particular I couldn't be more grateful to. When I went back to the room, they told me there was a lady, who's name I unfortunately do not remember at all, that would be in to check on me before the doctor showed up. She came in, asked how I was feeling, and volunteered to sit with me and hold my hand. I solidly do not think I could have gone through with it without her. I had my iPod playing, and I do remember it was a playlist of nothing but Three Days Grace and Shinedown, but I don't remember what songs played in the midst of it, and the whole experience was over in maybe four minutes. I remember the feeling all too well, and I will not describe it for you, but this woman held my hand tight and talked to me about the Lion King Broadway show. I have "Hakuna Matata" tattooed on my arm, she saw that and latched on, just started telling me how beautiful it was live.
I saw the mini one they have at Animal Kingdom a few months later, and have seen it two more times since then, and I solidly admit, I've remembered that conversation and I have teared up every time.
After it was all over, I was in a lot of pain, and have never actually been fully the same since. I found myself turning to music a lot again, and Disney movies. I had some good friends around that helped a lot too. But this isn't about all that, and I admit, I was terrified to put any of that out there. Hell, a couple of the friends that helped me through that time, probably just heard me admit that was what I did for the first time. I told a lot of people it was a miscarriage, just out of fear of being judged. But it is part of my life, and it shouldn't be such a stigma. People shouldn't be afraid to talk about things that have really affected them.
I realized while I was clarifying the years certain albums came out that one I was listening to a ton around this time, came out right in the midst of it all. Lifelines by I Prevail was on repeat for me, along with That's the Spirit through all of this. I also remember listening to "Cry" by The Used a lot, but not the rest of the album a ton. I think that was just out of anger, and trying to fight the tears.Also really liked Melanie Martinez' debut album, which I know was fairly new in 2016. That was a weird one for me to really get into, as I don't particularly like modern pop or female singers much. For some reason I did though, and "Mad Hatter" was a staple song for a very long time. That probably was a bit random to mention here, but it was definitely something I listened to a lot at the time. It didn't really have any emotional depth for me personally, I just liked it. I'm sure those weren't the only things I turned to at the time, but that's primarily all I'm remembering.
There's on a few more albums I really want to give mentions to, and they're not as situational. They're just genuinely really good albums. Those are Disease by Beartooth and Trauma by I Prevail. I don't really have a ton of reasons for those, except they're incredible albums.
If I'm honest, this is the only Beartooth album I like in full. There's a few other songs here and there I like from their previous albums, but this one hit on a different level for me. I can't really put my finger on it, and I actually am surprised I can still listen to them. I was really hooked on "Afterall" and "Believe" in a time where I was out on my own. Every time I listen to "Afterall" I remember walking to the bus stop to go just about anywhere from my house. It was stuck in my head for a couple months, so every time I would go to leave the house, it would be playing. For a little while, that memory, along with a few others connected to the song stung but it somehow never ruined the song for me.
As for the Trauma album, it hit on a whole new level for me, and I got to see them live last year. That was sincerely one of the most therapeutic times of my life ever. It was the first time I had ever gone to a show where I had nothing on me. I didn't even have my phone on me for their performance, I just was standing on the stairs of the pit, screaming my heart out. It unlocked something for me, and I've been completely hooked on "Bow Down" ever since. I already loved it, already loved the whole album, though it was fairly new at the time. This show as back in August, and I thought I wrote about it but I didn't apparently. That whole album is just insanely good to me, like I truly don't think I've felt so attached to an album in years. I can't even pick favorites because I think they're all my favorites. If I really think about it, I think I find myself turning on "Bow Down", "Hurricane" and "Rise Above It" the most.
"Bow Down" is honestly the opposite of my personality. Its strong, its powerful, a person like that takes no shit. Its got the kind of energy I would like to have more of. If you know me, I've said for years that "Scars" by Papa Roach is my favorite song, because it defines me. My weakness is that I care too much, so for this to also be one of my favorite songs is weird. I fully admit that, they can't be more different. That was just a weird realization I had while writing this, but for real though, one is about caring too much and being there for someone who is barely doing anything for themselves even, and the other is straight up taking no shit.
Though I guess that's not too weird, because in the end of "Scars" even, he still walks away. He stops being everyone's doormat, so I guess in a way, that's where I'm at too. They do kind of go hand in hand. Sometimes you have to care far too much in order to get to the point of doing things for yourself and taking less shit. Don't you love it when you get all deep with yourself when its not even your intent?
Well, its 2020 now, and this year, I want to do more of what makes me happy. I want to get back to my love of music, and I want the confidence I feel like I lost over the years. I'm already working on bringing the love of music back, I've been listening to it just for fun again, I'm back hanging out with my musician friends and going to local shows again. I'm practicing my photography and just trying to do more for myself. Its not a new years resolution, it was something I started probably last summer, mentally anyway.
Hopefully I have you guys along for the ride, for the fun and the love of music. Thank you so much for being there for the last almost ten years. Please let me know some of the stand out stuff in your life, music included, and here's to another ten years. Thank you so much for your support, I honestly would have deleted this if it weren't for so many of you speaking up with interest.
Over the years, I've shared a lot. A lot of memories, both good and bad, a lot of events, thoughts and music. Immortal Music has been practically part of my identity since before I turned eighteen, so its really been a massive part of my adult life. A lot has happened, and a lot has changed over the years.
The changes have happened naturally, and if you look through the archived posts, you can very easily see the times where I was more active, and when I was practically a ghost. The ghost times were usually harder times, whether it was life getting in the way or a burn out, they still happened. But I've been missing the warm feelings, and true satisfaction I have always felt while doing this stuff. So I want to bring it back, but I want to bring it back to the roots of Immortal Music. I want to talk, just for fun, and talk about music just for the love of it.
I lost sight of that at some point along the way. I grew more concerned about being professional and being taken seriously, so I never wanted to show too much of the fan side. That does exclude the Facebook page, for some reason I've always used that as somewhat of an outlet for myself. I don't know why that was a loophole and never will.
If I'm honest though, I'm getting back to that point where I don't care anymore. I already have a basically full time job where I have to be professional to a certain degree, I have to be taken seriously. Immortal Music doesn't feel like that place anymore, and I miss the fun of it. I miss gushing about my favorite bands with complete strangers who share my passion for music too. Hell, I was looking back at some of my early reviews the other day and I straight up did not care at all about what others thought.
Seriously, I compared someone to a dying cat because I just didn't like his vocals. Somewhere along the line, I got where I wanted to always be semi postive, even if I didn't like something. Which I don't understand, this whole website is mine. All the opinions are mine, and I know its okay to not like someone's work. I think I got to a point where I knew people were seeing my words, and I didn't want to hurt someone when they put in so much hard work on something. Why though? Just because I said I didn't like something, didn't mean others don't love it. Its okay to speak up, and nobody ever told me otherwise, so I don't get why that changed.
With that though, I also kept a lot of memories from shows off the website. In fact, every one of my absolute favorite memories from a show were not ever written about. I always left those moments out of my recaps for each event. Sometimes it was just to shorten an already long post, but sometimes it was because it felt unprofessional or like I was bragging. Yet every person I've ever told those stories to have either laughed their asses off or been fascinated. So why not share those stories? I'm positive others will love them too, if anyone ever sees anything. Algorithms on everything are sort of fucked right now, so frankly I get discouraged ever posting. I feel like I'm talking to myself half the time, which is why I get super excited when anyone interacts. It proves me wrong, and shows me that people are still out there. Thank you to anyone who actually does that for me, you have no idea what that means to me.
So, to try to bring that back, I'm going to start sharing some of those memories. I have stories from 2011 all the way up to now basically that I've never told you guys. Some revolve around interviews, others are just small moments that are so vivid to me from festivals or other concerts. Hell, I might even share some stories about Remedy X, the band I managed for several years. Some of you probably didn't even know about them, because while I talked about them, I didn't often associate myself with them on Immortal Music. I wanted to give them their own spotlight, not completely tie my brand to theirs, even though they were really connected. Fun fact; I technically started helping them before I officially started doing Immortal Music. I officially started this website in September 2011, but I met Remedy in November 2010, and I think I started managing them in July 2011, so it was just slightly longer. I have so many stories involving them too, we have a lot of good memories and sometimes I miss managing a band just because of them.
Soon I will begin sharing them, all probably in random order. This is simply the announcement post for the first series I've had in a very long time. This series will be called Faded Memories, and that name actually references "Bully" by Shinedown. Absolutely no reason, it just came to me, along with the lyric.
So, stay tuned and please share any stories you have as well! I would love to hear your fun adventures through music. Honestly anything involving music tends to make me happy, so anything goes really.
As always, thank you so much for reading, for interacting, ect, and keep coming back because I really am hoping to get back into the fun of all of this, and I would love to have you along for the ride.
Warning: This post has a handful of spoilers for All Time Low's Its Still Nothing Personal, and the documentary that goes with it. It also shows a slightly less professional version of Immortal Music, as frankly I was enjoying myself and did not feel like hiding any of it, and I wanted to be real with anyone who actually gave a shit. This post took a turn I didn't expect but its nice honestly, and I kind of hope All Time Low sees this just to see that they are inspiring people in ways they didn't even intent.
If you have not listened to the album, or watched the documentary and wish to avoid spoilers, I would recommend coming back to this post at another time. I also already did a review of Its Still Nothing Personal just this morning, so please click here to read that as well. I really appreciate your support, and I'm sure All Time Low does as well. Now that the disclaimer is over, we can get into the fun stuff. Carry on with me.
I decided to write this right as I was watching the 45 minute documentary, so all the thoughts expressed in this post are quick and genuine. If you haven't watched the documentary, as I said prior, you will get spoilers so, please watch it before continuing on. I don't want to ruin it for anyone.
I also want to just take a moment to completely drop the professionalism for a moment, and say how thoroughly impressed I am with this revisit. I have already listened to it all the way through twice this morning, and "Lost in Stereo" has already grown on me. I said in the review that the screams felt random and out of place, but after listening to it a time or two, I love it. There's also aspects that come with this whole journalism thing that make me never want to admit publicly when I geek out about something. It feels like fangirling, and I don't want to be seen as a fangirl. However, I just want to say I absolutely love the vocal style Alex Gaskgarth went with for this entire album, particularly on "Weightless." I borderline gushed about it in the review, but I'm really gushing about it in real life. That vocal style should be kept for all future work, that's all I'm going to say.
See, even there. I can't bring myself to bluntly say what I really want to say, so I turn it into that. Which is stupid, I guess because this whole post is kind of fangirling over All Time Low, so whatever. Plus you can probably piece together what I want to say. Anyway, moving on to the documentary.
I now see why the album felt very similar to the live shows, that's because it was recorded live. Still in studio, but it wasn't all pieced together the same, which is really cool. I really think its interesting whenever a band films in studio, you get to see the passionate, the process, just all of it. I can't really explain why that's cool to me, but someone out there understands, I'm sure.
That's really interesting too, Alex said "Weightless" came out of a place of writers block, and said that one had just hit differently at the time. That's always been one of my favorite songs, and apparently that's how the band all felt too, so I found that very interesting.
I love that they're talking about what inspired each of the songs, I always wonder about that stuff with basically any album from any artist. We can't get this kind of content for every single song for any album ever, but I'm a big lyric person, and a writer myself, so hearing about the writing process is fascinating.
Jack also said he's completely adamant about playing "Lost In Stereo" live, as well as "Break Your Little Heart." I'm not surprised, they're both very upbeat, and a lot of fun live, and he's a guitarist so of course he thrives on the energy.
Reminds me of the first time I saw them live, though I can't remember for the life of me what they were playing at the time. Jack got the idea to climb onto the speaker, and nearly kicked me in the process. I ended up slammed into the stage because fans flooded the barricade to get to him. He actually saw that and apologized, and I scared Alex because I started to climb up onto the stage to get away from being crushed. Well, that and I had my friend's mom's $1,000 Nikon in my hand and I really didn't want that to get damaged. Alex saw this though and gave me a look like "Please don't." and looked really concerned, so I didn't. Only time that ever happened, I might add. I wish I had a picture of either of their faces when that happened, honestly. I have pictures surrounding that moment, but not that.
I actually looked it up out of curiosity and found the entire setlist for that tour, which was the Rockshow At The End of the World tour in 2012, and if this is correct, it was "Shameless."
I'm sorry, I guess this post was less about the documentary, and more about me having fun while watching it. I haven't done this in a while, and I kind of have been trying to get back of my love of music again. That's all I even started this website for, was to share my love of music. And sometimes that comes with borderline fangirling, and I think I need to accept that. Not everything has to be fine crafted and perfectly professional, I have to have fun with it too. I shouldn't hide when I'm really excited about a band, a song or an album, and its all in my head that it looks bad. I really don't think it does look bad, more people probably have fun with it.
Like shit, there's so many stories you guys have never heard from concerts, because they felt unprofessional. Almost all of my favorite memories from any show I've ever covered actually have never been shared publicly because I was afraid they would be seen as unprofessional in some way. Which is ridiculous, because at the end of the day, what does it matter? So if anyone sees this and actually wants to hear those stories, let me know. Hell, I have a story from the All Time Low show I mentioned there, and conversations with other fans from the second time I saw them as well.
The thing is, I rarely actually remember the set lists or the show itself fully. Its always moments unrelated to the show itself that stick with me, but they usually come from a struggle or me being in the right place at the right time, or something like that.
Well, this blog post took a turn. I meant it to be a stream of consciousness about the All Time Low documentary only, and it ended up inspiring me to get back to what originally got me to start Immortal Music. Just randomly rambling about music.
I hope All Time Low knows they inspire all sorts of things and all sorts of people in many different ways. I'm going to shut up now, but I want to say I'm extremely proud of them and will continue to support them. Go get the new album, go watch the documentary. Please check out my review, and please keep interacting. You have no idea how happy your support makes me. I've felt incredibly discouraged for the past couple years, but Immortal Music is still part of who I am, so whenever I do get interaction, it truly makes my day.
Something happened at work last night that I found very amusing, and I thought a lot of you out there would as well, so I wanted to share. It was something very brief, just a quick little conversation between my assistant manager and myself. But in order for it to actually be humorous, not just complete nonsense, I had to give the back story. That made it a bit long winded, so while I did already post it on the Facebook page, I felt like making it a regular blog post here on the website. Hence why you're seeing it here, right?
If you did already see this post on the page, I apologize. If you didn't already see this, keep on reading, there's quite a bit of back story with a little joke at the end. I did word things different so those who have already seen this might not get bored, and I am adding some more depth to this. I also am taking the opportunity to give a shout out to my assistant manager, Justin. I did get his permission to do this, and thought I could take the time to give him a shout out for his own endeavors. He has a gaming channel that he is trying to grow, called Endoplasmite and I wanted to do whatever I could to try to support him. Please go give his channel, and Twitch with the exact same name some love. As you might know, I am not a gamer, so I cannot properly explain gaming channels, but I can say he's very dedicated and has a lot of fun. He's been working very hard to get back in the groove of streaming and uploading, and I want to try to celebrate all the hard work he's putting in. I know that is completely unrelated to what I usually talk about here, but we support our friends here, and I think everyone can get behind that.
Now that I interrupted myself with basically a brief commercial, I can get into your properly scheduled programming.
The two of us work together a lot, and because whoever picks our music clearly likes to torture people, I turn on my iPod a lot at work. If you've been around for a while, or even have just poked around the website some, you probably already have a good guess on what my daily playlist consists of. He, however, listens to a lot of classic rock, and off shoots from the 70's, 80's, even 60's. Bands and artists like Billy Joel, The Beatles, Elton John, ect. So obviously things I listen to, such as I Prevail, A Day To Remember, Shinedown, ect, aren't quite his usual cup of tea. But, due to how often I turn on my iPod at work, he's begun to pick up on artists, and I think he's actually starting to like some of it.
Because our differing music tastes though, somehow we have formed a running joke where he will sarcastically name the completely wrong band for whatever is playing. Such as asking if its Disturbed when its Panic! At The Disco. Please picture this with the same tone you read this Spongebob meme;
Every now and then though, he will acknowledge when he does know a band to me. I do think silently it happens more often, but he doesn't say anything often to me. Last night though, a My Chemical Romance song came on. Don't ask me what song, for the life of me I do not recall now. Though oddly, I do remember it was on Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge. Go figure, right? Memories are weird.
He was working on something not too far away, and then asks, "Is this the same band that does Black Parade?" I told him yes, it was. That was immediately followed with, "...My Chemical Romance, right?"
I told him yes again, and said I was very proud of him for that. We both agreed he's learning his stuff, and we all know me with music knowledge. It always makes me happy when someone is learning new things about any music really, especially when its through me.
About ten minutes passes, I'm ringing out a sale, and "Welcome To The Black Parade" actually does come on. He was just at the other register, so I said, "Hey, you know this song."
He almost immediately, once again in the mocking Spongebob tone says, "Is this Panic! At The Disco?"
I laughed and said it was similar, because most of us know the Emo Trinity. For those who don't, that's Panic! At The Disco, Fall Out Boy, and My Chemical Romance. Or at least it was, before MCR self destructed. Too soon? Sorry. We'll carry on.
He chuckled and in a totally serious tone responds with, "Just kidding, I know its 30 Seconds To Mars." And just walked away.
Maybe that is only truly funny to me, but I completely cracked up. The lady I was ringing up was laughing as well, though I am wondering if that was solely because I was laughing, Then I just wanted to share that with you guys, because maybe I'm not the only one that would find that funny as hell. Maybe its just the little things, I don't know.
Hopefully someone other than just me got a laugh out of this, or if nothing else, appreciated that I posted again? I am hoping to get that back on track, but let's face it, I've said that so many times before with no result at all. So no promises, but know you guys are still always on my mind, and I love you. This website will forever have a special place in my heart even if I'm not active on it.
Go give Justin some love, once again his name is Endoplasmite on both YouTube and Twitch. Also, feel free to tell me any of your funny music related stories. I'll talk to you guys soon with who knows what kind of content. We will just have to wait and see.
So, I saw a picture on Facebook asking 30 songs regarding music. I shared it on the page, one person did try to ask some specific questions, and I tried to answer but my phone spazzed out and deleted all my answers. Someone else had said they would like to see the answers to all the questions, so with those two things combined, I decided just to write it all down and share it here.
Also felt like I would take a moment to thank everyone for their support. I recently made a post celebrating ten years of the page, but I have since come to a realization. I cannot count. Its been 9 years, not ten. But I really liked the post the way it was, so I didn't want to change it. The Facebook page for this website is nine years old, while the website just turned eight yesterday. Since I so recently did the post for the website, I didn't feel like writing a whole other one. It felt like they would be too similar. I still felt like acknowledging it, so thank you so, so, so much for your love and support. You seriously have no idea what it all means to me, especially that some of you lost track and are now resurfacing and being just as supportive as ever.
Now enough with the cheesiness, let's get into this.
1. A Song With A Color In The Title-
My brain instantly went to 'Purple' by Pop Evil, but when I thought about it further I also thought of Black Cadillac by Shinedown.
2. A Song With a Number in the Title-
Song #3 by Stone Sour. Still don't know why they called it that, but its a very good song. And every time I think about it, I remember the video where Corey preformed it with his song. I'll leave that linked here for anyone who wishes to see that. It was so sweet to watch.
3. A Song that reminds you of summer time.
What's a song about sweating to death and hell? I'm kidding. Cool For The Summer by Demi Lovato? Probably sounds off genre for me, but fun fact I actually like a decent amount of her work.
4. A Song That Reminds You Of Someone You Would Rather Forget.
I don't really want to forget anyone exactly, but 500 Miles by The Proclaimers always reminds me of an ex because he played that one a lot. I do associate him with some pretty intense and dark stuff, so I guess that's sort of fitting. Just saying wanting to forget someone sounds really intense for me.
5. A Song That Needs To Be Played LOUD.
God, I could do a whole separate post on this one. Everything Asking Alexandria has ever done always seems to demand to be played loudly, Bow Down or Gasoline by I Prevail, Waking The Demon by Bullet For My Valentine. I could seriously go on forever.
6. A Song That Makes You Want to Dance-
None really, as I don't dance. But I guess I could say Lost In Stereo by All Time Low.
7. A Song To Drive To-
Pretty Handsome Awkward by The Used. I have so many good memories driving in the car with the band I used to manage, Remedy X as two of the members were really big fans of both The Used and My Chemical Romance. We'd roll all the windows down, and sing terribly at the top of our lungs, and it genuinely is one of my favorite memories with them, even though we did this often.
8. A Song about drugs or alcohol.
Is Don't Threaten Me With a Good Time by Panic! At The Disco about drugs or alcohol? I read this question and immediately thought of the line "Champagne, cocaine, gasoline and most things in between. " And the scenario in the song sure makes it sound like he had a wild night, so it seems fitting. If that one doesn't count, I'll go with Gone Forever by Three Days Grace, as that one personified Adam's drug addiction, and I have always found that to be incredible. Since it sounds like its about a person, not drugs.
9. A Song That Makes You Happy-
Don't laugh at me, but anything by the Jonas Brothers will make me happy. Well anything old by the Jonas Brothers. I don't hate Happiness Begins, but in my opinion its not their best album. If I have to pick just one song, That's Just The Way We Roll. If I really think about it I can definitely think of more songs by other bands, but that's what came to my mind instantly.
10. A Song That Makes You Sad-
I actually don't think I've ever addressed this publicly, though those in my personal life know about it usually. Photograph by Nickelback makes me bawl. Like I can't even hear the first few notes because I will cry. The reason for this is because it already had reminded me of my great grandmother who had Alzheimer, and then the universe really wanted me to hate that song and had it playing on the radio just moments after I was told my great grandpa had died. So, if you're ever trying to make me cry like a baby, that's a sure fire way to do it.
11. A Song That You Never Get Tired Of-
This is another one I could easily make a whole separate post on, because frankly there's so many. I Hate Everything About You by Three Days Grace, Tears Don't Fall or Waking The Demon by Bullet For My Valentine, just about anything from Shinedown or I Prevail, Scars by Papa Roach, most things by the Jonas Brothers or All Time Low. I seriously could go on forever.
12. A Song From Your Preteen Years-
Fly by Hilary Duff. Or, if you want one from when I was really little, 'Shape of My Heart' by Backstreet Boys. That song came out when I was seven and I loved it! I loved The Backstreet Boys so much as a kid, so they're generally very nostalgic for me.
13. One of your favorites 80's Song-
For some reason every song I tried to name was either made in the 90's or 70's. Maybe its because I was writing this just after waking up and not really sleeping much the night before, but I apparently can't think of anything.
14. A Song That You Would Love To Have played At Your Wedding-
When You Look Me In The Eyes by The Jonas Brothers. I have said this since the song was new, and it still stands to this day. Its so sweet, and adorable and I love it.
15. A Song That is A Cover by Another Artist-
Blank Space by I Prevail, Since U Been Gone by A Day To Remember -that one actually was the instance where I knew going into it that it was a cover. I think prior to that it was usually a surprise, or maybe it was just the first really good cover I had heard. I don't know. Also fun fact, everyone knows 1985 by Bowling For Soup right? Yeah, that's a cover. The original was made by SR-71, only a year later, and their version got popular when the original did not.
16. One of your favorite classical songs-
I apologize, I don't think I have one. Obviously I respect classical music, but its never been my cup of tea.
17. A Song That You Would Sing a Duet With-
I can't sing really, so I will name songs that are duets instead. Gravity by Papa Roach, the version of Breaking Inside by Shinedown with Lzzy Hale, If It Means a Lot to You by A Day To Remember.
18. A Song From The Year You Were Born-
I had to google it and apparently Stone Temple Pilots released their song "Plush" the month I was born, and it made it to number one on the rock charts at some point during the year. Or at least, according to some list I found.
19. A Song That Makes You Think About Life-
All I Want by A Day To Remember.
20. A Song That Has Many Meanings To You-
I thought of many songs that have a lot of meaning to me, but none that have multiple meanings to me, honestly. Like Scars by Papa Roach means a lot to me, so does Unity by Shinedown, All I Want by A Day To Remember, Drown by Bring Me The Horizon, One X by Three Days Grace.
21. A favorite song with a person's name in it.
Diary of Jane -Breaking Benjamin.
22. A Song That Moves You Forward-
Face Everything And Rise by Papa Roach.
23. A Song you think everyone should listen to-
Oh, there's so many. I'm going to go with Hurricane by I Prevail for now.
24. A Song by A Band you Wish Were still together-
I'm Here To Take The Sky by D.R.U.G.S. Wish they would have made more than one album.
25. A Song by An Artist that's no longer alive.
You Only Live Once by Suicide Silence.
26. A Song That Makes You Want to Fall In Love-
I already listed When You Look Me in The Eyes by the Jonas Brothers, so I'm going to also name I'll Follow You by Shinedown.
27. A Song That Breaks Your Heart-
Right now its Every Time You Leave by I Prevail, but that's just because its topical. It'll change again.
28. A Song by An artist with a voice you love-
Never Too Late by Three Days Grace.
29. A Song that you remember from your childhood.
Lucky by Britney Spears.
30. A Song That Reminds You of Yourself.
Scars by Papa Roach.
Well, that was fun. I hope you guys enjoyed this and if you do want me to either do more like this, or make actual lists like I mentioned previously, let me know. Also, please answer the questions for yourself!
So, I want to get nostalgic and a little (okay very sappy) sappy with you guys for a few minutes, if that's okay. Fair warning, I will probably ramble, but I promise, its worth the read. Today is the ten year anniversary of the Immortal Music Facebook page, and while that might not seem like much to any of you, its a big deal to me. For context, the page came before the website. When I made it, I didn't make it with intention of doing journalism, or anything. I actually made it just days after joining Facebook because I wanted to share my love of music with people.
I had only in the past year, maybe year and a half or so, gotten into rock music fully. I had heard a handful of things prior to that, but I only hardcore got into rock and metal at either fourteen or fifteen. I literally don't remember, and sometimes I feel like it was younger, sometimes it feels like it was older. I don't know, I don't care, I guess it doesn't matter. All that matters is I got into it, and oh boy did it CHANGE MY LIFE. For the better, of course.
Does anyone remember the first time they ever turned to music for comfort? We've all done it, turned on songs to drown out the noise of life, or as some kind of escape. A moment I remember often, though I don't believe I've ever talked about online, is the first time I remember turning to music for that purpose. I realized the other day that the moment I'm thinking of was probably right around ten years ago as well. I do think it was just before I made the page, I actually think it might have lead to me wanting to make the page.
See I was homeschooled, and there's groups you can join just to socialize, or do some extra classes, whatever. Ours was a little clique-ish, and sometimes I was included in it, but sometimes I wasn't. I don't remember exactly what happened, but I remember leaving one of our drama classes early one day. Something or someone had made me feel like shit, and I wanted to leave. So I was crying in the car, waiting for my mom to say goodbye or something. I don't remember that detail either. I turned on my iPod and initially turned on the Jonas Brothers, who were my favorite at the time. But it wasn't doing enough for me. I was still upset, I wasn't distracted at all. I was hurt and mad all at once, and just knew I needed to drown it out.
At the time, I'm pretty sure I only had 3 rock bands on my iPod. Those were Three Days Grace, Bullet For My Valentine and My Chemical Romance. I knew only a few BFMV songs at the time, and I knew they were louder than anything else I had. So I went straight for "Waking The Demon." I played nothing but those three bands for who knows how long. All I know is I calmed down enough I nearly fell asleep in the car, and I never looked back. From that moment on, I turned to music for comfort, to escape, or just for fun.
I don't know exactly when that was, but I am sure it was before the page was made. I randomly decided to make it, and it took a couple years before I really got any followers, so most of the time it was me rambling to myself and maybe twenty people about music. I felt like a low-key DJ though, just sharing music, and some news. I started writing blogs, just to talk some.
Eventually, I joined a youth group and made new friends. A couple of them are still among my best friends to this day, and both helped encourage the growth of who I am today. One of them showed me an interview from Bryan Stars, and I decided I wanted to do that. I had already been here and there posting news I saw, or sharing my thoughts on a now defunct blog, so it felt like the right thing to do.
I'm finding myself reflecting a lot on how much came out of me just wanting to share my love of music. I've been to 23 shows, most of which I either had a pass for, or just wrote about anyway. I learned I have a love of photography because of this whole thing, I've met my mom's favorite band, I've met part of one of my favorite bands, I've made so many friends, done so many things that most people would never do. Hell, I've saved a couple lives even. Those stories are not mine to tell, but it all came from conversations sparked through the page -for the love of music.
Its gotten harder, its gotten less rewarding over the years. I've gotten discouraged and burned out more than once, but none the less, this whole world is part of who I am. I am so grateful to all who have stuck around and supported me. So many people had no idea it was more than just a Facebook page full of music, and that's fine. I'm just glad people were able to share the love of music with me, and that I've been able to make people smile.
Thank you for listening to me ramble, and for you all your support over these past 10 years. Here's to so many more adventures, and memories.
Blogs of various topics go here, and all are written by Immortal Music's creator. You never know what you may find here, so have a look around.