Dreams are needed in life. Dreams, dedications, hobbies -whatever you want to call them. They're needed. There's more to life than just to live, and if you're not working toward something you feel strongly about -you're not living. You're just existing.
Which is fine, sometimes its totally necessary to simply just exist. Sometimes we need to just be for a while, to collect our thoughts, to sort things out, to relax, to grieve, ect. But many strive for more than just existence. Some don't, and that's great. Live your life for yourself. When you find something you're passionate about something, it becomes a huge priority in your life that somehow you always have time for. Its hard work, but its hard work that you like doing. And, its something that will give you a sense of purpose, and that is something incredible. Mine is this website. In early 2011, I had the realization that I could write about music, not just write and love music. So I started trying it, and didn't tell anyone really. I just started writing on a little blog, and eventually found the web host you see my website through today. I never really thought a little thing I did just to fill up my time would become such an important thing to me, but it did. New things have always scared me. I didn't learn to ride a bike until I was eleven years old, because I knew I'd fall along the way. I didn't learn to swim until I was almost thirteen years old, because I was terrified of the idea of drowning. So, rather than try, I'd be the one sitting in the shallow end, or keeping my feet on the wall, with an ring around my waist. I always see the danger in everything -and generally let fear stop me. This was different though.... I had no fear! Nothing about what I was taking on scared me, it intrigued me. As the bigger ideas reached my mind, those didn't scare me either. They intrigued me. I started writing down details plans and designs, and hid them away for safe keeping. I got my first interview in May 2011, with the rhythm guitarist of a band who no longer exists, and it made me want to try more. The first 'big' interview I got was Mayday Parade in November 2011, and when I sent the request for the interview, I told no one. I just sent it and hoped ot hear back. It was the first interview I ever asked for in person. Four days after I sent it, I got a response saying yes, I could interview them. That was the first time my mom heard about what I was doing, and she recently pointed out to that my website is the first thing I ever did without talking to her about it first. My mother and I are extremely close, but I also have been taught to live my life for myself, and I knew what I was trying to do sounded impossible, and I knew if I told anyone what I was doing, I'd be talked out of it. I'd be told, "Oh, don't bother them...They get a thousand emails a day, don't add to it for nothing." So, I just did it without any expectations. The interview did happen, but not in person. There was a misunderstanding, the interview was for email, not in person. This horribly disappointed me and their press person, to make up for the misunderstanding, gave me my first photo pass. My God was that a life changing experience. When she told me she was giving me a photo pass, I had never heard of such a thing. I didn't want to ask, so I just waited til the day of the show to figure it out. After that, I started trying to get a photo pass for every show. There's something unexplainable about the experience of being in front of the barricade. And to think I have now gotten to do so many incredible things all because I sent an email, blows my mind. That's the thing -sometimes, little things end up being big things. The entire first year, I actually was doing this, and making a portifolio for Alternative Press magazine. They never acknowledged me, and for a little while, that discouraged me. That's what lead me to doing my own thing, and now I couldn't be happier that I did. And I feel like its come almost full circle, in just a few years. I got the press request form for the 2015 APMA's, and its possible that I might get to go up to Cleveland, OH this year to cover them. This has been one hell of a journey so far, and the most insane part? This is only the beginning.
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January 2022
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